No Kids

Have you ever heard those people who say: "Who would want to bring a child into this topsy-turvy world?"

My response would be somewhat Socratic: "Have you ever heard of this thing--history?"

Even in the political and social near-utopia that was ancient Athens, only one out of four children survived past the age of 2 or something and people were dying at 35 from rotten teeth. (Not factual, by the way. I could look it up, but I'm not. You get the point.)

Or here's another one: I had this professor. I loved his class. We talked about politics and everything that was wrong with the world and we were realistic and engaged and he wore Birkenstock's in December. It was awesome.

So the class is going along and I'm having a good time and prof. says something about hating kids. Come to find out, he's like 60 years old and has no kids--but he loves his cats. Nothing wrong with that, I like cats. But he's on this anti-kid rant and he's not stupid, so he must have figured that some of us in the classroom probably have kids.

Well, I don't hold it against him, he's entitled to his opinion, but I pretty much stopped listening--not about politics though, this guy knows what's up--but about life. He doesn't get it. At 60 years old, he hasn't lived. Plus, I don't believe he hates kids. He's not Aleister Crowley, he's a nice guy, and a nice person can't just make a blanket statement like "I hate kids" and actually mean it.

Why don't these people just say what they mean?: I don't want to have a child because it will cramp my style.

That's pretty much it, isn't it? They don't want to spend their money on somebody else, they don't want someone else monopolizing their time, they just want their freedom. 

I can respect that. I don't want to spend my money on somebody else or give up my time to somebody else and I want to be free. I get it.

But there's a lot of wrong thinking that I would like to correct.

Here's what I gained when I had a child:

• Two best pals (Dominique and Amelie) that I love hanging out with. We go out to dinner, we sit at cafes and chat, we travel Europe, we watch movies, we go to concerts and tons of other great stuff.
• A new-found motivation to succeed in life. Whether it's my work or school or my music or writing, I take things a lot more seriously and I do things well and I do them right. 
• Someone who listens (and will continue to listen) to my rants about politics or society or music and art. See, Amelie just wants to learn about the world, just like we all did at her age. She's got questions and I get to use my ideas and knowledge and opinions to educate her in whatever way I feel is best (which is a great ego-stroke).
• Lots and lots of love.

Here's what I lost when I had a child:

• Getting hammered every night. Oh darn it. That sucks. It was so awesome to spend all of my money on a wicked headache. 
• Everything that isn't important. When you're limited on time, you tend to spend your time on more worthwhile things. I don't waste nearly as much of my life on video games, TV, loser friends, and pointless activities as I used to. Some, for sure, but not as much.

This is by no means trying to convince people to have children. It truly is a big responsibility to have some innocent, defenseless person be completely dependent on you. If you're not ready, you're not ready. I just don't want the excuses. 

So yeah, let's hear some of what you've gained and lost because of your kids down in the comments section.